No words
Just sounds
Sounds disconnected to words
Meanings loading them
making them matter
making them powerful
Crushing my voice
Interfering with my sound
My voice is part of my body
not my mind
which is also inside my body
but an entity of its own
My voice is not only an instrument but an organ
Having control over an organ
is a contradiction in itself
I am trying to control my biology
I am trying to play an instrument in the dark
My voice is a violin I have never seen
Instead of fumbling around blindly
I am looking frantically for the light switch